Soup in my Fly

I'm curious this morning, but I'll keep my curiosities brief.

Someone said recently "It's like slamming up against a brick wall with you!". My question is how do you know that? I've not slammed up against a brick wall.

Dad used to say things like "I'd rather have a fly in my soup, then soup in my fly"...really? Even cold soup?

Someone said "I ran into so-n-so today at the shopping center..." You should really be more careful. Why would you do that? Does insurance pay for that?

I heard someone say "I'm going to kick you all the way to China, if you don't cut that out!" Do you work out? How will you do that? It seems more likely that you could come to a complete stop while the earth continues to spin, and wait for China to hit you smack on your behind!

How about "You nearly poked my eye out!" How do you know that? If it were that easy why aren't there more eyeball donor hospitals out there?

For us less observant ones how about this one...? "You couldn't see a messy room if it came up and slapped you smack on the forehead!" Can it do that? That's just plain scary.

"If looks could kill"...I'd be like...so screwed.

Last but not least..."I'm going to throw you straight to the moon!" Y'know...I know the race to the moon has long since been won, but seriously...are you going to let your sibling or your spouse win your own race to the moon? C'mon! I want someone to throw ME to the moon! Wouldn't that be cool? Well...I would need a space suit first, but then throw away!

Have a good day.